Lesson #29 The Balancing Act

This could be a very tricky thing to do….balancing your life.  So what is balance?  The dictionary states that balance is “the equal distribution” of things.  Okay, I paraphrased….but I think you get what I’m saying.

Let’s look at typical human beans (this is how I spell us).   Okay, Jane and Joe both have a job, they have an apartment, Jane belongs to 3 clubs, Joe….bowls twice a week. On Sunday they attend church and have dinner with one or the other’s families.  They take turns.  Now, Jane only likes attending 2 meetings of the 3 clubs she belongs to, but she won’t give up the third because all the uber rich and amazing ladies are in that club.  Joe likes to bowl, but once a week is more than plenty for him.  He bowls twice a week because his boss is on the second team with him and he wants to appear like a “good company” man.  Jane and Joe both like the idea of church but, they attend one that is…wait for it……..uber cool.  All the supposedly rich and cool folks go there and Joe and Jane want to be uber everything.  Now just 2 miles away from their home is a church they have attended 3 times.  It is far from uber…..except in the God department.  The pastor is wonderful and offers sermons that Joe and Jane actually talked about the entire week after and they actually did things that the pastor suggested to do and they loved it.  They find going to dinner at each others families homes is nice, but doing it every single Sunday has become a bother.  They love their families, but they would really like to be at home on Sunday just to relax, talk, take a nap, and get ready for the week.  They have what seems like a balanced life right?  Well they don’t.

Jane sees her close friends very seldom, she doesn’t have time to go to Yoga (which she absolutely loves), she and Joe don’t take walks or bike rides anymore and  that causes her to feel sad.  Jane loves to cook, but with her job, the meetings, bowling, laundry, cleaning, returning phone calls and answering emails, there is NO time for any of that.  They have take-out almost every night for dinner.  Jane and Joe have unequaled themselves right out of life.  Can you imagine if they had a child?

So let’s sit down with Joe and Jane and see what we can do to help them find balance.  They are both willing and more than open to not being “uber”.  So, that means Jane could give up that club she doesn’t really care for.  Joe likes his job, but he won’t get fired if he stops bowling with his boss.  That frees up another night.  They decide that if they work together, they can clean the apartment, do the laundry all at once and be done with it.  They realize it can even be fun and gives them time to talk with each other.  As they looked at their schedules they decide they will each call their parents and let them know that they will only be having dinner with them once a month.  Guess what happened when they did that?  Both their mothers thanked them, because they were long past tired of cooking big meals every other Sunday.

Here is the life of Jane and Joe now.  Jane is able to cook and bake 4 – 5 times a week.  She got back into her Yoga class and sees her close friends afterward at a cafe nearby.  Joe cleaned up their bikes and bought new wheels and they ride together once a week.  Weather permitting they take a walk nearly every night.  Joe only bowls one evening a week now, so in place of bowling the other evening he either reads, watches television with Jane, or messes around with things that need to be fixed in their apartment.  He loves fixing things.  They have now even switched churches.  Instead of driving 17 miles one way to the “uber” church, they drive 2 miles to the church where they receive wonderful, uplifting and encouraging things to ponder and grow with.

Everyone needs the following to have a balanced life….if you work you work (and if you are a stay at home mom/dad you are working), then you need to have  “Me Time.”  This is time to just be.  You need “Social Time”.  This is when you meet with a friend or two and do whatever you decide to do.  You need to schedule time for taking care of the place where you live and your clothing as well as time to pay bills, return calls and answer mail.

The one thing that will totally mess you up is giving up your “Me Time.”  If you aren’t okay, I sadly promise you that everything around you will be messed up including your own health.

Balance.

Sarah©2012

hopeslifecoaching.com

 

 

Lesson #23 Appreciation

Appreciation.  What a lovely, 5 syllable word.  I looked it up in the dictionary and this is what I found:

noun

1.

gratitude; thankful recognition: They showed their appreciationby giving him a gold watch.

2.

the act of estimating the qualities of things and giving them their proper value.

3.

clear perception or recognition, especially of aesthetic quality: a course in art appreciation.

4.

an increase or rise in the value of property, goods, etc.

5.

critical notice; evaluation; opinion, as of a situation, person,etc.

 

Last night, like many other nights, I went outside.  It was a cloudless, full moon, January night.  The stars were amazing as usual and once again, took my breath away.  I get the same feeling when I hear small children laughing, or when a spring breeze blows my wind  chimes around.  Appreciation.  The noun.  For as long as I can remember I have had a deep appreciation for the small things in my part of the world.  My grandpa, who is now on the other side once said to me when I was crouched down,  overjoyed in a field of wild violets….most folks think those are weeds sweetie.  Oh my, oh my!!!  Two dozen roses, delivered in a box can’t take my breath away like wild violets.  Then again, I also think the dandelion needs to be our national flower.  🙂

Small things.  Blowing bubbles like a child, playing jump rope, finding cool stones in a creek, listening to the crickets at night in the summer.  Small things that I don’t take for granted.  My intention has always been, not to miss a thing.  I pay attention to everything and stay away from sensory overload.  I see the rainbows, I see the first snowflakes, I hear the first rumble of thunder off in the distance, I see the newest buds on the tress, I watch the older man and woman as they dance together like they did when they were younger.

I appreciate all of it.  I believe and recognize the “aesthetic” quality of what others may call weeds or noise or weather.

Take some time to pause and breathe.  Look up once in awhile, or look down when you take a walk in the park…like head for the trees and allow yourself to be filled with appreciation of the small things.

 

Sarah-Pink Welch ©2012

 

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Lesson #20 Newton’s 3rd Law of Motion…..or a God Law

Newton’s 3rd of of motion states…For every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction.  This statement it may seem rather contradictory.  So, here goes in people terms.  The statement means that in every interaction, there is a pair of forces acting on the two interacting objects. The size of the forces on the first object equals the size of the force on the second object. The direction of the force on the first object is opposite to the direction of the force on the second object. Forces always come in pairs – equal and opposite action-reaction force pairs.  It is even better to say…what goes around comes around, some folks call it Karma, some say what you give is what you get.

Nonetheless I think it is simply cause and effect.  When we throw a stone in a still pond it causes ripples.  As far as intention goes, before you take any action, stop and make clear your intention. Make sure your intentions are good, and good is what will be returned to you.  Intention is what causes the effect.

I happen to call this one of God’s Laws.  If you don’t have God, whomever or whatever is your higher power can be used.  When you are dealing with this law, you must walk, eat, sleep, and breathe your talk.  

We as people are energy.  I big, walking, talking form of energy.  We have the ability to affect people and things around us.  If we step off a boat onto the bank of a lake: as we move in the direction of the shore, the boat tends to move in the opposite direction (leaving us facedown in the water, if we aren’t careful)!  Every action we take creates a reaction in the world.  The total of all those actions is what we call our LIFE.

If you happen to be a person that is angry, you will without fail, attract angry people and situations into your life over and over again.  It’s similar to the definition of insanity some people use:  doing the same thing over and over again, hoping for a different result.  It just isn’t going to work.  If you want love, hope, wellness, prosperity, compassion, energy, flexibility, that is what needs to go out from your very core.

When we have made an intention that we want peace, calmness, happy people, etc., in our lives, it often means we must give up those people of situations that are the opposite of that.  There are people in my own life that I have basically had to separate myself from because they cause me hurt, both physically and emotionally.  Do I miss them, of course!  I also hope, pray and have made an intention that there will be reconciliation with them.

Take a really good look at yourself in the mirror.  What do you really want to be in this world?  Someone that attracts goodness or someone who thrives on chaos.  If you died tomorrow, what words would be used in your eulogy to describe you and your life?

I had an illness.  It was called the Dis-ease to Please.  If anyone wanted anything they came to me.  Why?  Was I the best?  Was I the go to person?  None of those things.  I lacked the ability to say NO.  Now I use that word without guilt or regret and feel so much better for it.  If you have the dis-ease also, the cure is NO.  If you are going to do something for someone or some event or cause, please do it with love and without expectation of reward.  Do things for love or don’t bother to do anything.

Cause and effect, what goes around comes around, as a man thinks so he is…..  Intention to me is a spirit practice, wishing is a head thing and dreams are dreams.

Love & Peace Always

                                                                                                                          Sarah© 2011

                                                                                                                           hopeslifecoaching.com

 

Lesson #19 My Intentional To-Do List

This is just an example of my to-do list.  It is fairly close to the real thing.  If you have any questions about living with intention, just let me know and I will do all I can to help you.

1.  Wake up totally well rested and so very grateful for the chance to honor a new day.

(How do I know I will be well rested?  The evening before I went to sleep, I made an intention to wake up that way)

2.  Spend some time just being.  Drink some awesome tea and listen to some none chaotic music.

3.  Do my morning prayers and meditation.

4.  Fix and eat healthy foods throughout the day.  (I need to eat 5 times a day)  I do not like to eat.  My intention to cover that is… I Love Food and Eating)

5.  Exercise  (For me exercise means walking, doing some yoga stretches or dancing around my living room for 30 minutes)  Our bodies are like machines…if you don’t use a car for say 6 months I promise it will either not start or the tires will have gone flat.  Most of us take better care of our stuff than ourselves.

6.  Complete my daily to-do list and use any left over time to do extra.  Yes, I have an actual to-do list.  I have found that if I pick one room a day to dust, sweep, and pick up I avoid doing all my cleaning in the same day or days.

7.  Set aside time for my friends and family.  I love to write handwritten notes and cards and send them to people I am thinking about.  I stay in touch with my adult children by simply texting an I love xoxoxox or sending an email.  I call at least once a week.

8.  I do something that I know will cause me to laugh out loud.  When my husband leaves for work he always says either do something that makes you smile or laugh out loud.

9.  Read a book.  I love to read.  I usually read 5-7 books a week and I love taking time to read, especially outside or all cozied up on a cold or rainy day.

10.  Do something for someone else whether I know them or not, or learn something new and interesting or do something positive that increases the joy ratio in my space of the world.

11.  Journal.  I have been journaling since I was 4.  I have three types of journals that I write in each day.  I have a prayer journal where I list prayer requests I receive.  I love it when I look back at my prayer journals and see in RED ink…YES.  This means that the prayer was answered.  My 2nd journal is my gratitude journal.  Each day I write down the things that occurred that I am grateful for.  My last journal is filled with things I thought of, funny sayings I made up, or I add to my Sarahism’s.  These are words I make up for daily use.  Most of my friends know them, but I love making up new ones.  So each and every day I take time to write.

12.  End my day peacefully.  Say my prayers and a big thank you for the chance to be available to anyone who is need.

As I said, this is an example….but it happens to be today’s to-do list.  It is my intention to encourage and inspire you to do something like this.  You  might notice there was no time for drama, chaos, or frenzy and today for example, there was none.

Sweet Dreams and Peace Always

                                                                                                                       Sarah© 2011

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Lesson #8 Normal……..really?….just sayin’!

I have spent time thinking about the word or the concept of “NORMAL”.

I have finally come to my own conclusion about “normal”.  I researched it, read about it, and have realized that I don’t fit the description in any way, shape or form.  I’m not sad about it.  I am happy that I made my own definition for it and I am totally content with it.

Normal is definitely not what I am.  No, I don’t eat worms, or wear hats made of tinfoil, but I am not normal.  The people closest to me really aren’t normal either.  That is where I found my definition…right there in my inner circle.  And it’s going to be the very same place where you will find what normal is for you.

My Definition:  Normal is whatever the majority of people in your life decide it is!!  It’s that easy or that difficult.  I have pink hair, tattoos, piercings, and like baggy clothes.  Now, some of my people have some of those things and we like each other a lot.  Some have none of those things and we remain good friends.

When I step away from my people,  I stand out like a 60 foot statue of Pooh Bear.  People stare, they whisper, they even point at me as if to say, would you look at that!!  How dare she look like that and in public too.  I dare because I can.  If I didn’t believe how I believe, if I didn’t dress as I do, If I didn’t surround myself with like minded people, I would not be me.  I would be someone else.

So, normal is whatever you decide it is.  As long as you are being true to yourself, not hurting or offending anyone, then you are on your own journey of normal.  Enjoy and smile!!!

Sarah-Pink Welch © 2011

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