This could be a very tricky thing to do….balancing your life. So what is balance? The dictionary states that balance is “the equal distribution” of things. Okay, I paraphrased….but I think you get what I’m saying.
Let’s look at typical human beans (this is how I spell us). Okay, Jane and Joe both have a job, they have an apartment, Jane belongs to 3 clubs, Joe….bowls twice a week. On Sunday they attend church and have dinner with one or the other’s families. They take turns. Now, Jane only likes attending 2 meetings of the 3 clubs she belongs to, but she won’t give up the third because all the uber rich and amazing ladies are in that club. Joe likes to bowl, but once a week is more than plenty for him. He bowls twice a week because his boss is on the second team with him and he wants to appear like a “good company” man. Jane and Joe both like the idea of church but, they attend one that is…wait for it……..uber cool. All the supposedly rich and cool folks go there and Joe and Jane want to be uber everything. Now just 2 miles away from their home is a church they have attended 3 times. It is far from uber…..except in the God department. The pastor is wonderful and offers sermons that Joe and Jane actually talked about the entire week after and they actually did things that the pastor suggested to do and they loved it. They find going to dinner at each others families homes is nice, but doing it every single Sunday has become a bother. They love their families, but they would really like to be at home on Sunday just to relax, talk, take a nap, and get ready for the week. They have what seems like a balanced life right? Well they don’t.
Jane sees her close friends very seldom, she doesn’t have time to go to Yoga (which she absolutely loves), she and Joe don’t take walks or bike rides anymore and that causes her to feel sad. Jane loves to cook, but with her job, the meetings, bowling, laundry, cleaning, returning phone calls and answering emails, there is NO time for any of that. They have take-out almost every night for dinner. Jane and Joe have unequaled themselves right out of life. Can you imagine if they had a child?
So let’s sit down with Joe and Jane and see what we can do to help them find balance. They are both willing and more than open to not being “uber”. So, that means Jane could give up that club she doesn’t really care for. Joe likes his job, but he won’t get fired if he stops bowling with his boss. That frees up another night. They decide that if they work together, they can clean the apartment, do the laundry all at once and be done with it. They realize it can even be fun and gives them time to talk with each other. As they looked at their schedules they decide they will each call their parents and let them know that they will only be having dinner with them once a month. Guess what happened when they did that? Both their mothers thanked them, because they were long past tired of cooking big meals every other Sunday.
Here is the life of Jane and Joe now. Jane is able to cook and bake 4 – 5 times a week. She got back into her Yoga class and sees her close friends afterward at a cafe nearby. Joe cleaned up their bikes and bought new wheels and they ride together once a week. Weather permitting they take a walk nearly every night. Joe only bowls one evening a week now, so in place of bowling the other evening he either reads, watches television with Jane, or messes around with things that need to be fixed in their apartment. He loves fixing things. They have now even switched churches. Instead of driving 17 miles one way to the “uber” church, they drive 2 miles to the church where they receive wonderful, uplifting and encouraging things to ponder and grow with.
Everyone needs the following to have a balanced life….if you work you work (and if you are a stay at home mom/dad you are working), then you need to have “Me Time.” This is time to just be. You need “Social Time”. This is when you meet with a friend or two and do whatever you decide to do. You need to schedule time for taking care of the place where you live and your clothing as well as time to pay bills, return calls and answer mail.
The one thing that will totally mess you up is giving up your “Me Time.” If you aren’t okay, I sadly promise you that everything around you will be messed up including your own health.