Tag Archive | healing

Lesson #71 Forgiveness Is Freedom


All morning I was thinking about forgiveness. That may sound strange but I had been thinking of the person who sells drugs to my kidlets and what I’d like to do if I could get him by himself. Not a happy thought. And I heard “forgive” start echoing in my head. So I am so big on encouraging others folks to forgive I better apply it to myself. Here are the things I do know for sure about it.
Forgiveness isn’t the same as reconciliation. Reconciliation is two people coming together in mutual respect. Reconciliation requires both parties working together. Forgiveness on the other hand is something that is entirely up to you. The person you forgive may be deceased or no longer part of your life, but once you forgive them it’s finished and you move forward.
Forgiveness is not forgetting. “Forgive and forget” always seem to be said together. The process of forgiving involves acknowledging to yourself the wrong that was done to you, reflecting on it, and deciding how you want to think about it. Focusing on forgetting a wrong might lead to denying or suppressing feelings about it, which is not the same as forgiveness. Forgiveness has taken place when you can remember the wrong that was done without feeling resentment or a desire to pursue revenge. Sometimes, after we get to this point, we may forget about some of the wrongs people have done to us. But we don’t have to forget in order to forgive.
Forgiveness is not condoning or excusing. Forgiveness doesn’t minimize, justify, or excuse the wrong that was done. Forgiveness also doesn’t mean denying the harm and the feelings that the injustice produced. And forgiveness does not mean putting yourself in a position to be harmed again. You can forgive someone and still take healthy steps to protect yourself, including choosing to totally detach from the person/persons.
Forgiveness is not justice. It is certainly easier to forgive someone who sincerely apologizes and makes amends. But, justice….which may include acknowledgment of the wrong, apologies, punishment, restitution, or compensation….is separate from forgiveness and may never happen.
Forgiveness is a powerful choice you can make when it’s right for you that can lead to greater well-being and better relationships with other people.
Forgiveness is freedom for you/me and as hard as it is, I am choosing to forgive.
I love you all so very much. I am sending you pink, puffy cloud huggz.  

Sarah-Pink Welch ©2013

Facebook: Sarah-Pink’s PromisePrint

Advertisements

Lesson #34 Addicted To Your Story March 27th 2012


My friend, who knows me as well as I know myself suggested I “get honest” and by writing this I am being truly honest.  You may not like it, you may be afraid, you may have an “AHA” moment.  Whatever happens, this is my truth to you.

I have been a Life Coach for more than 2 decades.  I have worked with many types of people….I am an equal opportunity Life Coach.  This is what I know for certain.  All people have a “story”.  Everyone!  The bad thing about that is you become ADDICTED to your story.  It is like everything else….if you keep repeating that story over and over again you become that which you are telling.  I am a recovering addict/alcoholic, and I have told my story so many times I lost count.  I do know that I had to stop telling it and for 99% of the time I have stopped.  The addict me, the alcoholic me, the adult child of an alcoholic me, the sexually abused me, the physically abused me is dead, the cancer patient me is dead, the full blown AIDS me is dead.  She is dead, she is gone, she is buried.

I was addicted to the groups I attended every single day became a new addiction for me.  Thinking of NOT going to a meeting caused me major anxiety attacks.  God intervened and I do not attend meetings everyday.  What I was doing was switching addictions.  Everyone I have ever met has an addiction.  Food, being perfect, sex, sitting at their computers doing anything but work, spending, accumulating stuff, eating, not eating, exercise, alcohol, over working, drugs, anger…the list of addictions is endless.

At the core of our being is some kind of PAIN…….which stands for Pay Attention Inward Now.  When we have become sick and tired enough or being sick and tired, we can reach inside and Feel that pain, Deal with that pain, and then Heal that pain.  I make it sound so easy and I know it is not.  But….you can stop to dragging it around like a security blanket.  Our pain can be from being abused, lied to, being told lies about ourselves, feeling alone and unloved,  feeling unworthy and less than.  All LIES!!!!!!  But, we keep sharing our story with anyone who will listen or read it….because that is all the identity we have.

I want you to know that you are able and allowed to heal.  I want you to know that you are worthy.  I want you to know that are loved.  I want you to know that you are not alone.  I want you to know that God does not make junk and the Big Bang Theory just doesn’t hold up.  I want you to know that as long as you keep hanging onto your story that is exactly what you will have in your present life.  Chaos, drama, fear, uncertainty, illness…they have become your companions.  Without them, you panic and have no clue who or what you are.

You are stuck in the muck of it all.  So, you decide.  Who are you now, minus your entire story?  What is your vision?  What do you really want your life to look like?

God will and can help you.  Stop living your old story….it is really not who you can be.  It is ugly, infectious, and it is not the present.  Holding onto it also acts like a dust catcher, so all the yuck in the world will keep sticking to your life, your very being.  Is that what you really want?  Yes, it is scary to think about all of this.  Without your story….who are you?  Without your story….who will you have to validate you?

I am asking you, encouraging you to take a leap of faith and Pay Attention Inward Now, then Feel it, Deal with it, and Heal it.  Lose the story.  Create your vision.  Learn to love living in peace.  It’s okay.  Just because happiness and peace may be something that you have never known consistently or had mere glimpses of, you have nothing to lose.  Your story will always be there if you have to live in the muck of it all.

I am here if you need me to help you co-author your New Life Story.  I am here to walk that journey with you.  You deserve better and when you know better, you do better.

Now you know the truth.  Are you willing to let go?

Sarah© 2012

hopeslifecoaching.com

***The Lemonade Stand®***


The Lemonade Stand® is a very special, and real place.  It is made up of a very diverse group of amazing people.  You will find The Lemonade Stand® on Facebook right now.  Soon, it will stand in it’s own light.  If you would like to join us, just send a friend request to Sarah-Pink Welch and leave a message with The Lemonade Stand on it.

The group was created to allow folks to come together with a single focus…..Whole Life Wellness.  That’s Mind, body, spirit, their homes, finances, relationships, their jobs and on and on.  If one part of your life lacks balance, everything else will sooner than later suffer for it.  When you ignore your own physical being how will you ever be able to show up for work and be productive?  If you have drama and chaos in your life, how will you raise happy, well adjusted children?  You won’t.

My colleague and Jersey sistah, came up with the idea to form a group on Facebook.  Diane Robertelli……you are one amazing and extraordinary woman!!!!  We are both Certified Life Coaches.  We have extensive backgrounds in fields that led us into the field of helping other people to live their best lives.  It’s our passion.  It’s our honor.  It’s our joy to walk the journey with the people we work with.  We love to see the healing take place, we love to see people make intentions and actually see them come to fruition.

So, if life has been handing you lemons, come join us at The Lemonade Stand®.  Pull up a chair and we’ll get to know you as we sip away on tall glasses of sweet, pink lemonade.

Sarah© 2012

hopeslifecoaching.com